*Sex God* by Rob Bell - Review/Analysis and Reaction

This entry is one week late. Sorry, Readers. I've been busy...

We Christians seem willing to surrender nearly every aspect of our lives to God. Yet when it comes to relationships...We often cling to earthly ideas about romance and sexuality. For many believers the Christian walk is still all about what we can't or should not do.

When it comes to love, people shudder to think that there may be limits concerning how we conduct ourselves with our partners. To a degree this perspective is understandable. The Christian life is a constant battle. It's a struggle to follow God's will over our own. But too often we forget that the One who made our every aspect created our sexuality...

First things first.

I don't know what kind of a deal Mr. Bell scored with Zondervan. Yet his boooks--all two of them ;)--are very well designed. Dare I say it--Sex God is one sexy book.

(photo lifted from Amazon's site)

Pretty, no?

If you think that's nice, you should see it in person...

All joking aside...Rob Bell is not a dating dictator. This book is a refreshing alternative to typical Christian relationship tomes. Bell doesn't spend time wagging his finger at readers: "You should sit this far apart on the couch....You shouldn't kiss ever/on the first date/until X, Y, and Z has transpired."

No hard and fast rules were mentioned. None were needed, because Bell appealed to his readers' common sense. Which is God-given, as far as I'm concerned.

He certainly isn't afraid to expound on verses that have been beaten to death. Consider Matthew 5:27-30. In this passage, Jesus says

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

Over time this verse has been used to reprimand singles "Don't look at that young man/woman with lust. Because then you'll be committing adultery, and therefore, bound for hell." Alternately, people have focused on the idea of gouging out one's eye. You might as well, because, after all, looking at a fellow human being and thinking s/he is hot is a serious transgression.

Bell interprets the passage this way:

"[Jesus'] point isn't that you should mutilate your body....His point is that something serious -- something hellish -- happens when people are treated as objects, and we should resist it at all costs." (22)

Think about this for a moment. When we disrespect others, we dishonour ourselves. Or as Bell suggests...When we disrespect other people's bodies, we disrespect the body, and dishonour the divine that dwells within. The body, of course, meaning more than our physical selves. Rather, consider the entire human race--including other Christians. For

"The new humanity is about seeing people as God sees them"(25)

One aspect of Sex God that intrigued--and pleased--me was Rob's definition of sexuality.

Let's look at one statement:

"...First our sexuality is our awareness of how profoundly we're severed and cut off and disconnected. Second, our sexuality is all of the ways we go about trying to reconnect." (40)

And another...

"Our sexuality is all of the ways we strive to reconnect with our world, with each other, and with God"(42)

As far as I'm concerned, sexuality is, in fact, about making connections. Or at the very least about arousal, on a different, deeper level. At one point, Bell notes that music is sexual. I agree with him. And, if I could add something, I think that food can be sexual. As can art, a sporting event, a lecture... When our deeper passions are stimulated, I think that our sexuality is being addressed. And as stewards of our senses, we need to be mindful of how we conduct ourselves and what we subject ourselves to.

"...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8

Eventually, Bell discusses the two Christian extremes concerning love and all things emotional: The difference between angels and animals.

In one corner, you have angels. These beings are too holy to be sexual in the human sense. There are those who aspire to be angelic in their perspective concerning sexuality. They aim to ignore their natural impulses. For instance, to them, flirting is never, ever wise. Even if the parties involved are single and compatible.

At the other end of the spectrum, you have animals. These beings give into their sexual urges whenever, wherever, however. They can't help it...Or can they?

When I was about 24, I was engaged in a discussion regarding chastity. I remember being told that people should have to have sex.

Why?

What's going to happen?

Will planets collide?

Will civilizations end?

Needless to say, I thought the idea was ridiculous. I believe that Rob hits the nail on the head when he concludes that

"When we act like angels or animals,we're acting like beings who were created before us. We're going backward in creation. We're going the wrong way." (63)

An especially poignant segment of Sex God discusses the idea of submission. Rob speaks of a counselling session with a married couple. The husband was committed to a certain point of view...

"At one point [he] got so angry that he looked at me and said, 'Do you see what I mean? She won't submit!'

To which I replied, 'Will you?'

Which didn't exactly calm him down.

He wanted her to submit, whatever that means, without his having to die. He was essentialy waiting for her to obey him, as a dog would, and then his will would be accomplished."(116 - empasis added)

A marriage is a partnership. Not a dictatorship. I wonder how many men out there want to be married solely because they believe that their wives will be there to serve their egos.

Women are human beings. Bell reminds his readers that God calls men to love us "as Christ loved the church." - Ephesians 5:25

Here's another point to ponder:

I've heard that some Christian men think of Genesis 2:18 in a way that I feel can only be called selfish. Let's begin by looking at the text itself:

"The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

Certain men consider the word "helper" in the servile sense. As women, supposedly, we should tend to our husbands as though we are maids. I think it's a pleasure to help others. Yet my concern lies with those who wish to take "helper" to a degrading extreme.

I am thankful for Mr. Bell's knowledge of Hebrew and Jewish history. For as he explains it...

"The word helper is the word ezer in the Hebrew language"(150)

He goes on to mention Psalms 121:1 and 2, which says "I lift up my eyes to the mountains--where does my help [ezer] come from? My help comes from the Lord". Again, the author elaborates:

"In Psalm 121, the word refers to help that comes from God. In Psalm 89, ezer means strength." (150)

How many men think of their wives as their strength?

In Sex God, Rob Bell mentions other subjects such as lust and guarding your relationship's privacy. In fact, I think he discusses most of the major Christain relationship issues that other authors have beaten to death. Yet thankfully Mr. Bell takes an intelligent look at Christian sexuality and spirituality. By appealing to his readers' intellect, I believe that he manages to address the Spirit within.